At first I thought this was an issue with suspend as everytime I would come back from suspend it would be 11gb+ of usage. Now however after a restart it starts at 100MiB and then slowly crawls up as time goes on. Closing all other windows, etc… does nothing and it will continue to increase its RAM usage and will not decrease. Sometimes when coming out of suspend the only thing visible would be a cursor on a black screen. I think this may be because all the ram is being used by xfwm4 in that case. Is this an xfwm4 leak or maybe some of the programs I use causing it? Typical windows I use are terminal, rofi, chrome, thunar, steam, spotify, discord.
Install ps_mem:
28.5 MiB + 1.6 MiB = 30.0 MiB nextcloud
33.7 MiB + 6.5 KiB = 33.7 MiB containerd
35.3 MiB + 14.5 KiB = 35.3 MiB dockerd
36.6 MiB + 208.0 KiB = 36.8 MiB syncthing (2)
39.4 MiB + 761.0 KiB = 40.1 MiB node (2)
40.4 MiB + 402.5 KiB = 40.8 MiB dotnet
48.2 MiB + 154.5 KiB = 48.4 MiB steam
47.8 MiB + 1.6 MiB = 49.3 MiB Xwayland
33.4 MiB + 16.5 MiB = 49.8 MiB apache2 (11)
51.4 MiB + 4.1 MiB = 55.6 MiB spectacle
72.8 MiB + 1.5 MiB = 74.3 MiB codeium_language_server (2)
74.1 MiB + 1.5 MiB = 75.7 MiB python3.12 (4)
83.4 MiB + 15.5 KiB = 83.4 MiB tailscaled
87.4 MiB + 13.7 MiB = 101.1 MiB kwin_wayland
144.8 MiB + 6.3 MiB = 151.0 MiB steamwebhelper (11)
175.3 MiB + 37.5 KiB = 175.3 MiB emacs-29.4
211.1 MiB + 5.7 MiB = 216.8 MiB plasmashell
303.9 MiB + 47.2 MiB = 351.1 MiB opera-beta (31)
366.6 MiB + 37.1 MiB = 403.7 MiB electron (12)
2.1 GiB + 115.3 MiB = 2.2 GiB vivaldi-bin (55)
7.6 GiB + 12.7 MiB = 7.6 GiB qbittorrent
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12.3 GiB
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This is just the bottom of mine. But bear in mind, Linux thinks unused memory is wasted memory 
It will use a lot and free up as needed.
Of course as soon as I start religiously watching task manager it doesn’t go over 150MiB… I’ll install this and use it the next time this happens but I think it isn’t handing over memory when its needed. I typically notice this when I’m trying to play a game and all of a sudden I’m getting skips and shutters, I then open task manager and there xfwm4 is sitting with 11GiB. I currently haven’t put the machine in suspend or hibernate since this post and there hasn’t been an issue. It may be related to that.
Looks like qbittorent leaks badly