Have Gnome installed on an Intel 8400, the ram usage is at 93% at idle and still climbing. Have 16 GB installed, cache is at 15 GB. Checked with free -h and system monitor.
Have the mainline kernel 6.9.10 and LTS 6.6 installed, both have the same ram issue. Tried X11 and Wayland, same with both.
Most of what seems to be “used” RAM is in buffer and cache. This won’t take any RAM from an application that needs it. Linux kernel will readily free up space in buff/cache if anything else needs the memory.
If you use your system as you normally do and won’t be noticing any lag or slowdown or else, I would say that your system is making an efficient use of the RAM.
Memory leaks are a known problem (bug) of gnome-shell. Use Wayland instead of X11/xorg. (Change on your login screen). In X11/xorg, restart gnome-shell with ALT + F2 , then “r”, then ENTER
You are perfectly in your right not to like GNOME but this is a technical forum and we value facts, sources, evidence, objectivity etc. and not nonsensical statements.