Remember that no matter how much chocolate you eat, your shoes will still fit 
PLASTIC BAG purchases are being
curbed by raising their prices, but is something bad-smelling also sprayed on them? When you open a new plastic bag, a bad smell wafts out from inside. If the intention is to reduce plastic bag buyers with the price, then make the price 99 cents. Bag-lady
A letter to the editor on local newspaper’s text-message section.
BREAKING NEWS
North Pole now denies that Santa had a list of children who were naughty or nice during the year.
DAILY PLANET — ANARCHY ON THE NORTH POLE
The lately introduced NPDPR (North Pole Data Protection Regulation), forbidding Santa to keep a naughty-nice list, has been deemed illegal, since the North Pole apparently doesn’t belong to any country and doesn’t even have a timezone assigned.
Which might explain why Santa can deliver so many presents in just one night. The Elves’ Workers Union (EWU) announced there will be strikes, because, as they say “workers will now have to re-enter millions of names into the database again, and Santa never invested in anything newer than dBASE.”
It appears they’d rather have the inhabitant of the nearby Fortress of Solitude do all the work, stating “he could do it much faster.” Do we have to face a huge immigration wave now, because all Elves lose their jobs?
We will keep you updated.